Jobs Simply

Is my job search poem interesting/humerous?

I get in my car, step out for more gas I need to keep looking, or this day will pass Looking for work, does have frustration To open these doors, to gain penetration No luck today, it must be a curse The local job bank, they just need a nurse They feed me a line, I get an illusion And in the end, it adds to confusion You'd think with these no's, my spirit will bend But I tell you right now, I'll look to the end They see my work, my papers unfold I see in their eyes, they think I too old If I was just younger, more dashing and bold They'd line my pockets, with offers and gold If they saw thru my wrinkles, and all these greys That I learned from them lines, I'm smarter these days They say at my age, I'm surely in trouble What do they think, they just burst my bubble And at the end of this day, I've heard enough crap Who'd want to work, for some young foolish sap

Public Comments

1. very interesting.
2. Good geez you made that up forget job searching become a poet! Good Luck with job searching!
3. Ha I agree with Elle Angel Very nice, very flowing, you made the rhyming look so easy!
4. Amateur poetry is usually so unbearable, but yours was humorous and fun to read! Good job!
5. Well, I'd normally pass on the comments, but your poem has so much potential that I thought I'd offer some editing suggestions. Here is how I'd rewrite it (minor edits, trust me). I get in my car and step out for some gas I need to keep looking or this day will pass Looking for work does have its frustration Opening doors just to gain penetration No luck yet today, it must be a curse The local job bank, wanted a nurse They feed me a line, I get an illusion In the end it just adds to my utter confusion You'd think with these "no's" that my spirit would bend But "no's" will not break me, I'll look to the end They see all my work as my papers unfold Their eyes cannot lie: they think I too old If I was just younger, more dashing and bold They'd fill up my pockets with offers and gold If they'd see past my wrinkles and hair full of greys That I've earned all these lines and I'm smarter these days They say at my age, I'm surely in trouble What do they think, they just burst my bubble? By the end of the day I've heard enough crap Who'd the heck want to work, for some young foolish sap? Hope this helps Great poem!